How to catch and turn a grump around
Jan 22, 2020
Have you ever had one of these days?
You wake up with memories of things that irked you in the past. As you go through the day they keep popping into your head and you start repeating old stories. Your mood gets affected, and suddenly the end of the day comes and you realise you've had a crap day.
Most likely you have - well your version of this.
Today was one of those days for me. I woke with lingering dreams of years gone by, still irked by them. There was a not-so-subtle hint that I was holding themes that would do me good to resolve. (I'd taken on beliefs about the events that were still informing my decisions rather than the me I want to be deciding how I would react). As I got up I was aware of these dreams, but didn't give myself time to really understand what they were there for. I was on a mission to meet a friend for our 6 am walk.
As we started walking I found myself talking about the things from my dream that irked me. The conversation felt uncomfortable yet I didn't stop. It felt vaguely familiar but again I didn't take time to work out what it was. Then suddenly there it was: Hang on a minute. This is me 18 years ago. What's happened to the me I know and like now?
As you know, we create what we think, so I wanted to get to the bottom of this PDQ and get back on board with the way I usually think and create in my life.
After the walk (which was fabulous by the way) I decided to come home and spend time meditating on it. My first approach fitted the drama I had been creating: Distraction! I started weeding the garden (yes, at 7 am). Then I started to sort out my yet-to-be-fully-unpacked study. Hmmm! I asked myself: Do you really want this to go unresolved for another day? Do you want to let this continue to run your life? Do you really want this diluting what you are creating? Pretty powerful questions and the answer was clearly no.
I sat down and had a great heart to heart with myself and used the following steps. They work a treat with other people I work with and knew they would help me, if I could focus enough to actually do it. And yes, I did focus and within a very short time I felt fabulous. I could feel my heart rippling out again, a smile was back on my face and the day has flowed beautifully.
Here are the steps so you can use them yourself. I suggest you adapt them to suit you, but recommend you follow the basic steps.
- Find a space that you can spend 15-20 minutes uninterrupted so you feel safe to explore this.
- Connect into the greater essence of you. For me this is usually with Unconditional Love. Take your time to really feel this compassionate Love energy in you and expanding within and around you. Today I felt other support surround, link arms and hold space with me.
- Imagine that you (the person you are today) is co-creating with the compassionate Love that's surrounding and flowing from you. Then imagine that you and this energy, essence, support, are pouring your focus onto the aspect of you that is being triggered. For me today that was a version of me 18 years ago.
- You might find it helpful to imagine that triggered part of you in a beautiful bubble filled with Unconditional Love, or in the centre surrounded by the compassionate Loving space you have created.
- There are two ways that seem to work really well here and I tend to flow into what ever feels most appropriate for the situation: (a) is to ask what happening and what is the most helpful thing to transform the situation. Trust the information you receive. If you find your mind attempting to answer, then you aren't really giving the Unconditional Love the opportunity to show you. If your mind is attempting to take over, perhaps switch to the next option. (B) Ask the part of you in the bubble or centre, what it's feeling and what it needs. Do this from the point of co-creating; being the observer. Honour it by letting you know you heard what its feeling and needing.
- Imagine the Love, compassion and support around you supplying what that part of you needs. You are not doing the supplying, you are simply witnessing. Trust that this is happening.
- Come back to focusing on yourself again, keeping yourself surrounded with the support. Be compassionate and gentle with yourself.
It's a very easy strategy to do, but some days getting yourself to take the time can be the deciding factor. If you are distracting yourself as I initially was today, go easy on yourself. Then do it anyway!